All I know so far. How P!nk remains a power house after 22 years, while embracing all the misfits.

 

 

 

 

I watched the new P!nk documentary on Amazon Prime “All I know so Far”. Is easy to see how she remained a powerhouse for the past 22 years. It’s ok to be different, you don’t have to fit in a box.

Yesterday I watched the new P!nk documentary on Amazon Prime “All I know so Far” and even though this is not a review, I’m going to say what it felt like for me, seeing a person that I have followed for the past 20 years, in her deepest fragility and strength P!nk is a powerhouse.

What makes her so great, I think, is the fact she sings for the raging souls, for the mischievous, the outcasts as she embraces everyone, making everyone feel like they are being heard.

The documentary shows her touring stadiums around all over the globe, while taking care of her family, also the relationship with the kids and husband, while managing to play in full arenas. I was awake almost at 1 AM, watching it without blinking. Again, P!nk is such an inspiration and her kids are adorable!

Love the documentary, love the album, love everything!

One of the most emotional moments, spoiler alert, was when she reads a letter from a UK fan, telling P!nk how important her music was and how she saved her life, during the most difficult moments. How her music and her attitude were always inspirational.

The girl also told in the letter she was being bullied at school and the only happy moments were when she arrived back home and put the VHS to watch something on MTV about P!nk. That’s when I started crying and thinking about my teenage years.

I want to be somebody else.

My teenage years were at the beginning of the 2000s. At the time, for role models we had Britney Spears and Christina Aguilera, singing about a boy who drives them crazy for whatever reasons or singing “I’m not a girl, not yet a woman” in a gorgeous setting, with perfect hair, makeup, and body. In low-rise jeans. I wanted to be like them, so bad. I used to straighten my hair to the point of getting a headache in the morning. I thought that to be accepted, you had to be beautiful.

Living in Rio also burns you into being patronized. You must-have highlights, long hair, nails done, a big butt, and nice clothing. You have to look like the girls on TV. I had nothing of that. So when I was rejected by schoolmates, bullied over my hair or because I wore glasses, or because I was considered too chatty or “too crazy” for their standards, listening to Britney and Christina singing about boys, didn’t make me feel any good. That’s when I found out M!zunderstood, P!nk’s second album.

I’m not that complicated, I’m just misunderstood.

Even though I didn’t understand the lyrics just by listening at that point, I loved the melody and the waves of anger. P!nk was rock and roll, progressive, and ahead of her time from those other girls. She sang about the reality of most of us. She embraced all of us and sang about our broken pieces and our disappointments with life in general.

One particular song of that album, still ingrained in me, on to the deepest levels. If I listen to the first accords, I start crying. “Don’t let me get me” was a reflection of all my teenage years. I was a reject, an outsider, a stranger to myself. I didn’t like what I saw in the mirror. Nobody did. One particular night, on Valentine’s day, when my 13 years old cousin got a gift from a boy she had a crush on, I fell apart listening to this song. Why could nobody like me?

I was already 16 and nobody cared about me, much worse, there was absolutely nothing I could do to make someone like me. What was wrong with me? So I put on my boom box, turned off the living room lights, and stared outside my window. Cars passed and the songs of M!zunderstood cut me deep. So I realize P!nk would be the singer that would bring rough honesty to my life, singing about real problems we all go through and not some made-up shit about being pretty and boys making them wait.

Where I could run, as fast as I can, to the middle of nowhere

When she sang “Just like a pill” I felt like it would be great to run away from all my problems. At that point in my life, my mom was raising me, all by herself, in Rio, with 3 jobs. I used to talk to my dad on the phone every Sunday. Some Sundays he disappeared. He had depression and a drinking problem.

That forced me to grow up much faster than any of my friends, I had to be mature enough to understand why he was never there for me. He was living in a different state and 2002, communication was scattered, we didn’t have cell phones or internet.

Being bullied at school, talking to my dad every other Sunday, and having no perspective of the future, all I had was music and stories I’d write to escape from my reality. Fortunately, the time has passed, my face and my hair fell into line, but my attitude never changed. My essence is still the same. In 2012, when I met my now-husband, P!nk released a song that it felt was written based on my life, again.

No one else can break my heart like you

“True Love”, talks about the turbulences of being with someone you love, at the same time the person annoys the hell out of you. I told Josh, at that time, that this was going to be one of our songs. He didn’t understand, because the song has very sharp words towards a loved one. If he only saw me when I was a teenager, he would get it. Crying in the window while listening to P!nk, made me who I’m today. I’m so thankful for that.

If you are one of my seven readers and something doesn’t feel right in your life, please be patient. The universe always turns everything around. I never thought that when I was gonna have anyone special in my life, heck I never thought I’d have anything at all in my life, at some point.

That’s all I know so far

In my teens, I felt underappreciated and ugly. As time passed and everything got better. My mom says “There is nothing like one day, after another” or “The darkness of the night is here, so we can appreciate when the sunlight arrives”.

I don’t like toxic positivity, where everyone keeps telling you all will be alright if you just get over it, or work hard. I know it sucks but hang in there. It sucks for everyone, they just lie compulsively on social media for likes. P!nk told me that it was ok to be a chaotic mess in my most fragile moments.

I moved on. I’m happily married, to someone that loves me with all my quirkiness and loves my natural hair.

Do you have anyone in your life, like a singer or a writer, someone that inspires you, or help you get by? Please let me know in the comments who is this person in your life. As you can see, I rely heavily on creatives to help me to get over my issues.

XXXJS

Things I started paying attention after the pandemic

Can we stop talking about the trainwreck 2020 was? No? Ok. Can we also stop trying to improve other people’s lives with useless tips? Yes, please. Alright, so let’s talk about things I started paying attention to after the pandemic. I promise this isn’t ” You should try it yourself” type of post or “I did much better than you during the pandemic.”

Not at all. I’m constantly writing my struggle to connect with people who are living through the same energy.

That’s why I write this blog.

Life was always busy, running around, planning, executing (sometimes, let’s be honest) trying to hustle and bustle. It seems that the roaring ’20s was about to start and I was ready to step on the gas and let amazing things happen to me. I lived January and February of 2020 with intensity and planning for the rest of the year.

In March, as we all know the hourglass got clogged and stopped, as we were all left wondering what was next, for God only knew how long. We didn’t know when life was going to go back to the normal, matter of fact, I don’t think it ever will. Vaccinations or not, the Pandemic changed everyone’s life. For better or for worse, we all are going to have stories to tell about those months the entire planet was stuck at home, cooking bread.

My stress levels 

I listened to hours and hours of podcasts, about the pandemic and whatnots, meditate, and got myself an apple watch. Even though I think the watch harasses me, telling me what to do, like “breath” “walk more” “get you bums of the couch, lazy bitch, you’ve been in the same position for 3 hours”.

I decided to tag along and just listen to what I think matters, not the passive-aggressive notifications I receive all day long. One good feature of this watch is that it can measure your heartbeats, so if you think you are struggling to control your nerves, you can calm yourself, with breathing techniques.

I learned that your stress levels are entirely up to you. If your mind is spinning out of control, and you feel like passing out, try to manage how you are breathing. You are the only person who can do that, and no one, not a boss, not a friend, not a significant other can do it for you.

My food – Trying to eat healthier

Discovering new ways on how to eat better, without sacrificing my love for chocolate. It’s not the chocolate that makes you sick. It’s all combined. The chocolate, the pizza, the frozen lasagna, the fried chicken.

I’m not an expert on anything, but I decided to give it a try and see how my body feels. I understand that most of the time we don’t have time to eat all the food from the pyramids, green, yellow, orange, red, and so on.

It’s too hard to follow a super healthy diet, so I do what I can. Walking around TJ Maxx, I found some Superfood Green Powder that you can make smoothies with and bought some fruits. Felt like a winner immediately!

 

The alcohol consumption 

Working in restaurants, I had to try different types of drinks and beers constantly, to be able to sell them to my table. I enjoyed it, I learned a lot, but I stopped working in restaurants in December of 2018. As I kept trying to make drinks at home, putting to practice how to mix different liquors, the pandemic hit, and what was a hobby, almost became a problem.

I come from a long line of alcoholics. My grandpa, my dad, my uncle, and some other family members that don’t assume they are, but it’s very clear for the rest of us. If they are happy, they drink, if they are sad, they drink, if it’s hot outside, they drink beer to cool it off, if it’s cold outside, they drink wine to keep warm. As I said, it becomes a problem when it’s constant.

The only stores opened during the pandemic in Austin, were, guess what? The liquor stores. It’s weird for me that a mom-and-pop food truck couldn’t be open, but a large retail alcohol store could. Anyway, so every Friday, I walked myself to the liquor store to get a different liquor to mix the drinks.

I also had some wine.

As we all lost track of what day of the week it was, it becomes more and more normal to drink wines on Monday, Cocktails on Tuesday, beers on Wednesday. After two weeks, I talked to a friend about how all this alcohol intake was coming and we decided together to stop and only drink on Fridays. It worked well until I started working again last month, in a hotel, which debunked everything I have been working towards last year.

Give me a break, I’m trying here.

Be more active

Long walks without destinations are my gem. In Chicago, I used to walk for hours and that kept me active. Living in a city where you are car dependable, makes it harder. Denver has a lot of parks, but to get to the park, you need a car.

There are days when I still walk to Walmart and around the park close to home. I only do that so I can close my exercise ring, on the apple watch. Once again, the watch harasses me if it thinks I’m not doing it enough. It is my day off watch, leave me alone.

Be thankful ( paying attention to small victories)

I learned how to count small blessings during my day and pay attention to what is working. If my remote control works without me having to it against something, it’s a beautiful day. If I can be outside, in a coffee shop, while watching people pass by, something that didn’t happen last year, I’m thankful.

Happiness is made of a fraction of moments. Victories, accomplishments, learning new things, meeting new people. What people get wrong is because they were taught that we have to be happy 100% of the time, if we are not, something is off.

Don’t take sunny days for granted

Photo by Rampal Singh on Unsplash

We live in Colorado. Winters are long, and there is a possibility it might snow in May. Don’t put the snow boots away yet. Wait another week. I was born and raised in Brasil, where we take sunny days for granted.

We don’t have cold seasons. In the United States, I learned that seasons exist and some of them are longer than others. So enjoy the sunny days, wherever you are.

Meditate and learn how to control my emotions 

 

Listening to podcasts like Mindful for beginners or Headspace helped me to center whatever chaos was happening during the Pandemic. I needed to hear myself breathe and make sure I was alive.

I was getting angry with everyone and mad that I couldn’t live my life the way I intended. The internet super-achievers were also not helping. I guess getting away for a few minutes from social media, to reconnect myself, it’s a habit I want to keep forever.

Understanding that other people are struggling too, I don’t reign on the struggle.

Struggle with mental instability is not a privilege of a few. We all got derailed at some point of this lockdown, wanted to leave to a different place, start over, and all these emotions that come when you are removed from your normal daily routine.

Into to the Unknown

The Unknown is scary, unpredictable, and leaves us wondering what is next, it’s not a good feeling. For some people, this is the epicenter of craziness. How dare you act like this with me? Well, we are facing the same type of issues, some on a different level than others.

Some people like to say “we are all in the same boat”. Yes, Kylie Jenner, but your boat has 5 floors and I’m fighting the tide in a little canoe and a broken paddle.

Normal people, not the Hollywood crowd, are struggling to keep their mental health in check. What we have to do now, is have some compassion. Take a deep breath, and remember we are all trying our best. Ok, some more than others. Some people are just mean because they want to be and no pandemic will change that.

All I know is that being stuck at home for over a year, gave me the ability to reinvent myself and do whatever was missing in my life, during the busy days.

I baked, I meditated, I put on 5lbs, I started eating better and paying attention to my mind, body, and emotions. I delayed all my career plans for my writing, I’m doing what I can. One day at a time.

So, what did you change in your life during the pandemic? Let me know in the comments if you got a new hobby or restarted a new old one, you had to put it aside. How are you taking care of your body and mind after this mess?

What makes you feel alive?

Coming out of the situation we were all put in last year, a few of these habits had the power to make me feel alive. Especially on those days, you had nothing to look for or any idea how long this situation would last for.

How long are we going to be in lockdown? How long are we only going to visit the supermarket and drugstore for fun? Thoughts like “will my life become entirely digital, without any other human contact, smile, or even facial recognition because we are all be wearing masks for the rest of our lives?”

There were so many questions I couldn’t find the answer at that time, and the only way out was to find things that made me feel alive. Felling alive and blessed for having a healthy strong system, enough to keep me safe during the pandemic, while a lot of people struggle, was a plus.

That led me to think and evaluate the true thing that keeps me alive and happy. Whatever brings a smile to my face or a giggle while walking around.

What makes you feel alive? Here are a few things that make me dance around.

The bright sun in the sky

At this point in my life in the United States, I’m somehow used to long winters. I lived in Chicago two different times and I know how dragging arctic winters can mess up with your mood, leading to seasonal depression.

I’m so thankful I was in Texas when the pandemic started because just imagining being cooped up in a tiny apartment for months, drops my mood to the ground.

I grew up in Brazil and we have the sun almost all year round, so when I had to deal with drag, short days, getting dark at 4 PM, that was it for me. Living in Colorado is also cold, but they have a lot of sunny days here, and that helps me to smile more. I love opening my window and see the light shining bright, it pushes me forward to keep moving.

Everyone looks happier when the spring and the summer start.

Dogs

Dogs are my kryptonite. I love dogs and I just want to be around them. I had two dogs before of my own, one we adopted and another one we foster at the beginning of quarantine. There is no greater love than the love of a dog, they want nothing in exchange, they just want love and treats, and that I have an abundance of. My parents adopted a stray dog, while I was visiting them in Brazil, last March.

Baby Kiara, the stray dog who won my heart <3

Baby Kiara is about three months old and she was found at the veterinarian clinic by the vet. She is the most adorable thing, but she is in trouble, because she looks like a little rat, running around the house, and sometimes we trip on her. She also bit the walls, everyone’s feet and she barks at an empty bottle filled with rice grains my mom gave to her. This time was especially hard to come back home because I got used to her. I hope she remembers me when I go back next year.

Walking around without a destination.

Usually, I put on my favorite playlist, something from the late ’90s or early 2000s, like Nsync or Britney Spears, and march away. Sometimes I walked so far, I had to take the bus back. That used to happen in Chicago a lot.

I used to live in Lakeview East, close to the Wrigley Field Stadium. Summertime comes around and I walked to the Lincoln Park Zoo. Had to take the bus back. On one of these random walks, I was listening to Beyonce and almost got hit by a car, because I was distracted and didn’t pay attention while crossing the street.

Listen to my favorite song.

Having a very peculiar taste in music, so depends on the day, I can go from Katy Perry to David Bowie and Fleetwood Mac in an instant. I traveled through decades and my playlist is adaptable. If I want to be happy in an instant, I will listen to Mariah Carey. I recently bought a karaoke mic and I’m driving my neighbors up a wall while singing “Emotions”. At least they stopped stomping in my head at 6 AM.

Food ( either cooking or eating it)

I get hanger. I don’t know how to deal with the feeling of being hungry. It puts me on a spiral of emotions and drama, I overreact to simple things, and have I mentioned drama? I love food. That’s a given and I also love cooking. I’m constantly checking for recipes and trying new ways to improve my meals. We don’t allow mac’n’cheese or frozen lasagna in this house. The joy of serving other people also makes me feel alive. For me, the act of cooking for someone else shows great compassion and caring for others. Food is energy and if you have good energy, it should be shared.

Observe the nature around me

Great things happen when you are not being distracted by your phone. A walk in the park can be refreshing and you can observe different scenarios every time you are out. Living in Colorado, I can see the front range mountains and it looks like a painting on the wall. Hiking gives you another sense of adventure and you can listen to nature and relaxing with the quietness, even though most of the time Mariah is singing her jams rent-free in my head.

Visiting my family in Brazil.

That’s the one thing that brings me the most peace and keeps me centered. Living in the United States, makes me feel I’m losing my identity, little by little. I know who I’m, but my life fluctuates between two different cultures.

My past and my present collide, sometimes I question my choices. When I’m in Brazil, I have all the love from my family, my food, my music, my tv shows. When I’m in America I have financial stability, some sense of security, and all the makeup Mac can make, that back home would cost me an eye and a leg. Life choices, am I right?

That’s how I see myself living in America.

I don’t regret living here, but I would like to go back to visit more often. My parents are getting old and I haven’t been there enough. Do you know that “missing hug people” you felt the entire last year? I have been in this situation for years

Find whatever makes you happy.

I read once that happiness is a feeling and not a constant state. That made a lot of difference in how I pursue things in my life. Gratitude and the simple things I can achieve helps me to move forward in life, without being so hard on myself.

That’s my list of what makes me feel alive. What’s on your list? Dogs, cats? Ice cream, traveling? Let me know in the comments!

XXX

J.Snelly

The New Roaring 20’s are coming!

When the new roaring ’20s finally starts!

After a week of feeling low, I’m back ! And since this blog is about empowerment and positivity, today I’m writing about The Roaring ’20s. As soon as the vaccine is in, I will start getting ready to be out. It’s easy to understand now why people from the roaring ’20s were always overdressed. I can’t wait to paint my face with make-up and do my hair to hang out at Target.

The 2020 decade we are still in the running to be able to enjoy. After endless hours of laughing at memes, watching reels of people I have no idea what intentions are, and the news saying we are all doomed, I want to start my roaring 20’s. The time I was morphing into my couch is over. I’m ready to shine.

Ready to shine into the new decade

This pandemic stuck us all in the house, living in a dystopian future, waiting for a vaccine and cure for some new virus we had no idea what was causing or how could we cure, except be away from each other. That for me it’s the worst part. Not being able to laugh with my friends in person, meet up for lunch, spending the holidays alone was borderline neurotic. Human are made to have contact with others. We needs hugs, smiles and electronic devices are not made for that.

Day after day, I lived in hope of being able to regain some control over my life, the hope of being able to walk around free. I don’t know about you, but I’m staying at home for almost a year now. At this point, I’m feral and I need to be introduced to the wild again. The other day when I went to the grocery store someone walked in my direction, and I flinch. Like the stranger was going to ask me something. That leads me to the question: are you ready to go outside and start to live your life again?

The 1920’s

After the 1918 Spanish Flu, which has a lot of similarity to the Corona Virus, also trapped people at home for almost two years, “The Roaring 20’s” got this name because of the new possibilities at the beginning of the decade and the new possibilities shining upon people.

The 1920s was a decade of a lot of progress, the 19th amendment finally passed in the State of Tennessee in August of 1920, women finally gain their rights to vote, the women were also gaining space on the job market and living a liberation unknown for them so far. It was a decade of industrial progress, people moving to big cities and suburban families being considered upper class.

It was also the decade that brought us Jazz and the Flappers. Ladies who were in short dresses and short shorts, dancing around and being free. Would we ever be able to be free like they once were? I hope so.

The Great Depression of 1929

Due to the crash market in 1929, the country went into a big recession. According to historians, because of the mass-produce of goods, consumer debts, and the stock market. It’s weird to think that now, we are living through the same difficulties because of bad virus management. You can tell me whatever, I still the virus was managed poorly due to 45th president. If the president told us, when he first got the briefing, instead of using us and our health, as a political weapon, we would have been better. Now he is finally out, we are starting to see some light at the end of the tunnel. It is about time. There was also the alcohol prohibition, I believe thats the era where the speakeasies had a huge boom. Drinking underground was the way to go.

What is going to be new in the New Roaring ’20s?

I think people will still be cautious for quite some time. The maniac hand washing. The inside sneeze when you are in the middle of the store. The explanatory after coughing “I’m not sick” eyes. After we get vaccinated, the media stop focusing so much on the death rate, and start focusing on the curve flattening ( did that ever happened at any point?). We will regain some confidence to go outside, and that my friends will be the moment we are all waiting for.

Once people realize that life is getting back on track, we will be able to go out with friends, barbecue with family, go to birthday parties (no blowing candles, that over forever). I wonder if single people will be able to date strangers from an app without asking for a negative covid test before agreeing to meet? Here is my million-dollar idea: The app may have to create a QR code, like a restaurant menu.

Are you gonna be able to sit next to a stranger?

Maybe we will drink from a stranger cup like they did before? If your best friend never offered you to try some of her drink at a festival, she is not your best friend. Life Pre-Covid was hell unsanitary. Licking your fingers to open a plastic bag at the grocery store? Never again.

Are we gonna be able to sit next to other people in theaters? How long it will take for us to feel comfortable sitting next to a stranger? Is the Waffle House big depression going to happen? Cause the restaurant is known specifically for their unsanitary behavior and there is no other place to go at 3 AM when you crawling back home from a bar.

I miss seating in a restaurant, with live music playing, or some karaoke bar, where people are convinced they are on The Voice. I need to showcase my talent to people other than my husband.

A few things I plan to do when the restriction are lifted :

Travel abroad. I’ve been stuck at home this entire time thinking about traveling to Greece. I follow an account of a photographer and the country is gorgeous. The scenery is idyllic and the water is crystal blue. I’m not going to even start it with the food.

Go back to school and get a certificate in Writing and Producing. I will probably have most of the classes taken, but I’m interested in learning about the Film Industry as a business and not only as an employee. I want to be able to produce my own content and for that, I need to learn. And no, I want to actually go to school and network. I took Creative Writing online and it led me nowhere, because of poor networking.

Go to a Carnival and eat all the food at the food stands. Hotdogs, Cotton Candy, popcorn, and just people watch.

Go to a concert. Or a show. Or just watch someone play the guitar so we could all sing along while drinking.

It’s about appreciating the little things!

It’s about appreciating the little things. The New Roaring 20’s has everything to be the best decade of our lives yet if we only allow it to be. If we are not so scared to live it up, after the hardship that was the beginning of the new decade.

The vaccine is here, soon it will be for everybody, and we will be finally free, but only if we want to be free. Some people might take longer to adjust, some might be too scared to go out again. Everyone should do as they please, but in my case, I’m going to enjoy it. I’m going to go outside and make some memories. Other than stay at home and watch other people having fun.

The time is up! What is your plan when you are finally able to go outside without restriction? Sing at karaoke, eat at a Buffet in Las Vegas, go to a concert? Let me know in the comments because I need ideas too!

Stay healty! Stay Sane! We almost crossing the line!

J.G.Snelly

Diary of a Procrastinator

Procrastinators United ! It took me about 15 minutes to get the word Procrastinator right. Lucky me, there is an autocorrect, otherwise, I would still be trying to write it correctly. Also, because I got up from my chair many times. 

A few years ago, I learned the word procrastinator and understood the reason it takes me longer than anybody else to get things done. Not that I don’t want to do it, I feel like I work better induced by a panic mode. My best stories came out of a total neurotic mode, and psychological derogatory behavior. I postponed it, with the excuse I couldn’t do it, only to speed up and create an entire storyline in 7 hours. 

Get it done!

Not easy, but I got things done. My brain works like an hourglass, only to work the very least grains of sand to hit the bottom. I can’t possibly be the only one who works like that. 

Procrastination defined as the act of delaying or postponing whatever you have to do, and for that, I will take my place and crown as the queen.  

Thinking about that, I decided to share the Diary of a Procrastinator, based on my writing school days. Based on a real daily struggle, who fluctuates between laziness, lack of confidence, and other more interesting things to do.  

Monday

9 AM 

Dear diary,

Today is Monday and I have a lot of plans for this week. I need my coffee before I start writing my plans for the day. I have to check my phone first to see if there is anything new going on with my friends. 

10:30 AM

Dear diary,

There was not much going on with my friends, but I just saw that Ben Affleck and his girl broke up and that led me to check his career and previous girlfriends. I’m now checking his relationship with Jennifer Lopes and how he was a big part of Jenny from the Block video. They were so cute together, she even made a song for him called Dear Ben. Oh, wait wasn’t that Taylor Swift? Never mind. 

12:00 

Dear diary,

I finally sat down to write the plans for the week. Got distracted by my imaginary friends on Twitter and their accomplishments. How can’t I get any of this? Am I not working enough? Probably not. 

1:00 PM  

Dear Diary,

I called a friend this morning for advice, she just called me back. We talked about our plans to get things done, as she doesn’t get anything done either. We spent two hours on the phone talking about how our rich friend got rich. That train has departed for both of us, as we are already married. Not with each other though. Well, you know what I mean. 

3 pm 

Dear Diary,

When I sat down to write my plans, I got hungry. I decided to cook a new recipe, and for that, I would have to take a quick trip to the supermarket to get the ingredients that I don’t have. I went to the seafood aisle three times, as I was indecisive about the shrimp size. Jumbo Shrimp? King of the Sea “it could be Ariel’s father” Shrimp? 

5 Pm 

Dear Diary,

The food was delicious! I had to take a photo and post it on my social media. Now I just wait for the 3 likes I usually get. Even though I spent a good ten minutes putting filters to make it look better, my hashtag game is weak. I’m finally ready to write my plans for the week. 

6 PM 

Dear diary,

I wrote two paragraphs and I felt like a winner. It wasn’t my weekly plan yet. I got back on Twitter and made an entire statement about Ben Affleck and how his Batman was terrible. Probably the worst. People agree with me and I feel like my voice was heard. 

7:30 Pm 

Dear diary,

Right after serving dinner, I sat down to watch the news. It was all terrible and it looks like we are all going to die. That depressed me and I can’t focus. I stared at the wall in despair from all the bad news I heard about the Virus. It looks like we are never going to be able to leave our houses, besides going to the supermarket.  

10:pm. 

Dear Diary,

As I’m falling asleep, I have another great idea for a story to work on this week. I would get up and write about it, but I’m pretty sure I will remember the first thing when I wake up. Where do your thoughts go when you fall asleep?  

Tuesday 

9:00 Am 

Dear Diary,

Yesterday was a busy day, but I didn’t work on what I prompted myself to. Today is the day I have to get it all done because the deadline to send all the writing pieces are tomorrow. Today I will have to focus and I’m going to try to keep my phone away and work without distractions. I can’t remember what my idea for the story was, when I was falling asleep last night, I should have wrote it down.

11:00 Am

Dear diary,

Before I put my phone down, I checked my social media to check on the world’s latest news. I saw a notification that someone replied to my Tweet post from yesterday, saying that Ben Affleck was a great Batman and I was a hater of DC Universe. If that can’t start a war, I don’t know what else could. 

12 PM 

Dear Diary,

I wrote a few words on my planner, that contains an hourly plan for my day. It’s already 12 so I had to skip the first 6 slots. Who in the world wakes up and starts working at 6 am? No wonder everyone here is a bit neurotic. The lack of sleep messes with their brain. My cat is finally back. I was not even worried about him, because he goes around the neighborhood whenever he pleases. People feed him and he goes back home when his scheme is discovered. He is just a needy fat cat. 

2 PM

Dear Diary,

The plans to let my phone alone didn’t work. The notifications keep beeping and I got back to it like a cat following the laser. It looks like Ben Affleck got a lot of packages from Amazon, and now I’m highly invested in knowing how nice it would be to buy all you want at once, instead of pretending you are not interested, only to buy two days later. I need to go back to my planner and write my pieces. 

4 Pm

Dear diary,

I only have about 8 hours to finish my piece. Between planning, writing, and editing I’m already two days late. I don’t know If I will be able to do that. I’m just gonna watch a youtube video to get me back in the mood. 

6 PM 

Dear Diary,

I got hooked on travel videos on youtube and now I understand how planes work. Not that this is going to help me to write my piece, but at least it gave me peace of mind for my next trip. Even though I have no idea when this is going to happen, due to Corona. My husband just asked me if I finished my story. Oh damn. I only have six hours now. 

7 PM 

Dear diary, this is not even funny anymore. I waited too long. Now my idea for the story doesn’t seem to work. I’m still on act one. This is not how I imagine the story in my head. It’s not working, I’m hungry again and I want to cry. This character is boring and it is not moving the story forward. Should I replace it now? 

9 PM

Dear Diary.

Ok, there is no panic, I’m still working on my second act. As I decided to check for different word meanings, I logged into Pinterest. I don’t know how checking the best travel luggage is going to help with my story. But it’s good to take a break. As I got back to my story I had to read it again and now, as the nervous breakdown starts to show up, as I don’t think this is any good. Why are my stories never good? Am I being too critical of myself? My heart is beating fast.

10 PM 

Dear Diary,

I finished act 2 right at the moment when the cat decided to meow like there was no tomorrow. He also ate the plant and jumped into my keyboard, like the mean creature he is. If I fail this assignment, I will blame him. 

11 PM 

Dear Diary,

I wish I could get some help. I feel like I’m having a heart attack, I can’t fail this class. My story is all over the place and I only have a few minutes to submit it. It’s not my fault that I have a life and a cat. Wait a minute. The cat is playing with the internet wires on the floor.

11:30 PM

Dear diary,

The cat ate the cable of the internet and my vision went black for a few seconds. I needed a minute to remove the cat from that area, put him in the room, and fixed the damage. The internet is now back on. I still need to edit my work. 

11:45 PM

Dear diary,

My writing piece is gone. The program shut itself and now I can’t find it anywhere. That’s it. I’m gonna fail. I can’t even think now. 

11:55 PM

Dear diary,

I found the document and edited it the way I could. The cat is meowing so loud, it looks like he is gonna break the barrier sounds. 

11:58 PM

Dear diary,

I finally submitted my story. I feel so accomplished! Next time, I will work on my pieces with more time, so I can breathe! The cat is out and now he hates me. He just dropped the plant vase from the window.

Wednesday :

9 AM

Dear Diary, I just received an email from my professor. He said I sent him my resume, instead of my writing piece. He said he would love to hire me, but that’s not the case now. 

The end!

This is a fiction piece of how my everyday life at school while undergoing Creative Writing classes would play out. Most of it its true, except for the cat.

Thanks for reading!

Let me know in the comments if you are a procrastinator too and what makes you work faster!

J.G.Snelly