Dear 16 years old Joana,
This is a letter from the future to tell you: you made it. You are now a 36 year old woman, living in the United States as you’ve been manifesting so hard. I understand now how much you are wishing to leave, to break free. School is breaking you apart and you still don’t have a boyfriend. He will be here soon. But he won’t be the love of your life, someone will come later in life to fill the gap.
You don’t need to believe you are as ugly as they say you are.
Your face will get it together and your hair, let me tell you, your hair will shine. Not this grease, pack of curls cat maze your have it on. Now we have access to great products that won’t cost an arm to buy it. We have good shampoo and withal the right tools, you can leave the house feeling good about yourself. Nobody will make fun your glasses either.
At some point will you feel so confident, you won’t even bother putting the contacts lenses.Your glasses will actually compliment your nose, because we can’t change science, and the nose will keep growing as we get older.
So many things changed and thankfully it did. Life found a way to be fun and worth living. I’m so sorry you feel trapped in your bedroom walls. It won’t be for too long. You will choose a career that will allow you to take on a new path and see the world. Kinda of.
In a few years you will have the coolest job. The people will be nice to you, and you will finally feel worth it. People from all over the world, friends for life. And someone that at that point will make you believe that he is the love of your life. Hint again: not yet.
Not even close. Your infatuation will mess you up and drive you crazy. For longer than you expect. Hang in there. It’s all a path of learning on how to love yourself and discover who you are.
You will be a writer. This love of writing fan fiction will remain, like a constant river. Time will pass and you will hold on to these stories and make sure to never let go. Again. You will have to take the unpaved road to learn how to work, take care of yourself, but you eventually go to creative writing school. In the United States, writing in English. It seems fantastic right? I’ts because it is. All those Hours watching Friends episodes will pay off.
That will lead you to have a blog and something called a channel on the internet. Not quite like MTV, but close.
20 years from now, J-Lo will get back together with Ben Affleck, Gilmore Girls will have a reunion show, and Avril Lavigne still going to be relevant. She is now singing about divorce.We all knew Sk8iter boy a loser all along.
Britney Spears will lose her mind and her freedom. Paris Hilton is now Sliving, still also relevant. All the members of the Backstreet Boy will be married with kids. None of them are yours.
VHS and DVDs are goin to be in the old box memorabilia somewhere in your mom’s house. I know you are dying to have a DVD player right now and you can’t afford it. In 2022 we will have something called streaming services, where you basically pay a monthly fee and watch movies 24 hours a day. Life is fun, but the fun will be interrupted for two years, because we are going to have a pandemic.
At the beginning will be a virus that’s is coming from China and making everyone sick. Then people start dying, day after day, 100 then thousands, a day. People will be disruptive and fight over everything. Lock people inside of their houses indefinitely and see what happens.
I don’t remember people fighting like in 2002. Which platform they used to be mean to others? It started to look like a school recess, where the bullying scream if they think you are fragile and not easy manipulated. They scream at you because you have a different opinion.
Besides all the drama, all your family members are still alive. Your dad will be back into your life and then get severely ill. Your mom will take over, again. That woman is a beast!
When it comes to friends you will still having the same people in your life, with an addition of a few. Renata, Patrícia, Illy, they are all still there. And so it’s Leticia. You will lose one of your dearest friend along the way. It will crush your soul. It will also change your way to live life.
Due to so much moving around you don’t have a career. You have jobs. Not the perfect white fenced suburban American house either. Neither Monica’s apartment. After all, New York is the most expensive square ft to live in. They sold you lies. It’s all good. It’s sure does like you live inside your own sitcom.
Your husband’s family are much like “Everybody Loves Raymond!”. Not that invasive, but I’m sure they can’t stand your face. After all you are an immigrant. They don’t seem to accept that fact that you come from somewhere else, other than their church community. You are not what they wanted for their perfect son.
To wrap this up, let me tell you you are happily married. It’s seems impossible to anyone to even like you right now, but he will come along. After all the trash you accepted along the way, until you get to him, he will make it worth it. He actually likes the same songs as you!
He is more like a great value Nick, from the Backstreet Boys, you will get this joke later on. He loves you with all your quirks and perks. So please don’t think you have to change to be accepted. You are just in the wrong side of earth.
Hope this letter find you well and comfort you in your worries. Now you can go back to your Brazilian teen magazine and rest assured that your future is bright!
Joana – 2022.