The train wreck that is 90 day Fiancee – Part 1

Imagine yourself going on vacation to spend a few days with your girlfriends at the beach, soaking in the sun, drinking, enjoying your free time. When you get there, you meet a guy/girl, falls immediately in love with the stranger. You guys spend the next days in a romantic cloud before you leave back home to America, he proposes. You say yes, to the person you met 5 days ago and decided to apply for a K1 fiancee visa. You decided you will marry the stranger you met on an island and you guys will live happily ever after. That’s the entire premises of the TLC 90 day fiancee show and that’s only the beginning of the chaotic life the couples will have ahead of them. 

I couldn’t write a better script. 

 I started watching 90-day Fiancee about 3 years ago when a friend told me about it. I was instantly hooked. As an immigrant, I could resonate a lot with the cast, in terms of, what we have to go through to get here, and getting adapted to live in the United States is the same. Finding love abroad and make it work on the motherland it’s not necessarily an easy path to follow. The show generated multiple conversations with my American husband while trying to show him that is exactly how a foreigner feels, while they arrive in a different country. 

The TLC big hit generated a good amount of spin-off, such as Before the 90 days, when the couples travel just to meet each other and figure out if they actually are what they say they are, or a complete nutcase all together. 90-day fiancee “Happily ever after?”, follow some of the most popular couples after the marriage, or the divorce, like it was the Larissa and Coltiee case. Recently TLC released 90 days – the other way, with the Americans traveling to live abroad with their significant other. Its highly entertaining to see these people trying to figure out life in a country where there is no toilet, no A/C, a lot of os mosquitos, and no running water. Big Ed showering with the rat in the Philippines is one for the books. Four ft nine Ed was already bothered by every single thing he encountered, Rose and her 4-year-old son were living in extremely poor conditions, sharing a house with her entire family, with her dad and sisters, and the rat. They were all sharing the space in harmony because that’s what people outside of America do, they don’t have a choice neither do they most of the time can’t afford to live better. We don’t have a luxury, we have the basics we need to live and most of us don’t know or understand how the United States runs, and I’m pretty sure that’s what causes the commotion while trying to adapt here. We don’t know what to expect, besides what we have seen in movies and tv shows. 

This week, another season of 90 days Happily Ever After comes to a wrap. It was a crazy season where no one was happy, they all considered divorce, shoes were flying, manipulation was at high stakes, plastic surgery was made without any money and Angela kept her mind games with poor Mykul. That man deserves to come to America more than any other person from the cast. Thinking about this season and some other seasons, I concluded that TLC’s money machine is based on the same troupes, season after season. After some time, I did some research and found out that the show sometimes manipulates their reactions to make it more interesting. It worked, because lately, I have been watching like its a very dramatic soap opera, that it is on air at 2 pm for the past 30 years, like “Days of our Lives”

troupe verb

trouped; trouping

Definition of the troupe 

intransitive verb

: to travel in a troupe

also: to perform as a member of a theatrical troupe 

I put on together a list of the cast that are part of the same troupe; Let’s start with the old ladies first, in respect to their age. 

The Old Ladies who want the youngsters: 

Angela, Baby Girl Lisa (Aka – Angela wannabe), and Jennie. 

Angela was the pioneer. She met Mykul on Facebook and decided to meet him in Nigeria, where she verbally abused the hell out of that man and he patiently accepts her tantrums and gives her cake as a peace offer. I guess he understands she is older and has some serious menopausal sing issues. He respects that, at the same time they want to have a kid together, but she can’t “tote” the kid, because, oh well, menopause. After being on the series of the show’s franchise, they finally got married in Nigeria, after Mykull had his fiancee visa denied. Hey, immigration, maybe he is the Nigerian prince we keep getting emails from since 2010. Let him come over already, he deserves it. 

After Angela, we got the Great Value version of her, Baby Girl Lisa. What is up with these old ladies and the Nigerian guys? Baby Girl Lisa fell in love with Usman, who is a singer and made her a song. That damn song verse “baby girl I’m in love with you” with that autotune was on an endless loop in my brain for days. Make it stop. Lisa is also jealous, feisty, and angry, but Usman is a little bit less patience than Mykull, he fights back. And no cake. Lisa wanted to be in his music video, because the song was for her, his manager/friend said it was not appealing to the viewers. I laughed so hard I spilled my drink. A goat as a gift for his mom, which they insanely transported inside of a Volvo to his mom’s house. There were plenty of memes about Lisa with avail in her head, praying, while she looked identical to the ET on the movie. I live for #90dayfiancee on Sundays. 

Going far and beyond we had Jenni. She moved across the globe to be with Summit, in India, when she got there, he used to disappear like a cat, coming back home eventually with the sad look on his face. Something was bothering him and I called it “He is married. He probably has another family” .He did and it was a whole altercation. His family showed up at the apartment door, Jenni cried, felt betrayed, got back to the States, just to go back to India for another season. This time is for sure! I guess…

The ghostly golddiggers and the delusional: 

Maria and Lana and The Williams

Maria/Caesar

Years and years taking money from Caesar, without a single drop of guilt. Caesar as a nail technician was being drained with the promise she would go see him at some point. We all cheered, we spend the entire season thinking she didn’t exist He was eating ramen like a college kid working like a maniac, for her just to live her life in Russia. At the Tell All episode, she showed up, even the cast was in awe and yet, she didn’t want Caesar, 

Lana/David  

David, much like Caeser, fell for a Russian girl he paid to talk on a website, about 200K in seven years. She answered him, but every time they have to meet, she fled with a crazy excuse. Once again, we call the guy crazy and the girl, different than Maria, actually showed up at the very last minute. She didn’t speak any English, so they used the translator. She was shy and confused by the man she was talking for the past 7 years.  

Yolanda/ The Williams

We don’t have pictures of The Williams. Yolanda doesn’t have any photos either.

Much like the other in the delusional troupe, Yolanda fell into the internet catfishing hole, and it was too easy for The Williams to play his game. He told her he was from England when she asked which airport she should arrive, he didn’t know. Like everyone in her troupe, she kept believing in his lies. At first, I was like “protect Yolanda at all costs. Please don’t hurt her” At the end of the season I was like “The witch is crazy, so many clues and how can’t she see that?” Then he blackmailed her. She sends nude photos to him. We were thinking he was part of Usman’s Nigerian friend’s group “The yahoo boys”. The viewers are great with conspiracy theories and I can prove! 

The boy-child troupe

TLC is coming with another show soon called “I love a Mama’s boy” and I don’t understand how Colt was not cast for that too. His relationship with his mom is weird, co-dependent, and invasive. At least that’s what they show on tv. I don’t know what is real or not, I judge by what I see. He listened to his mom, instead of his new wife, forcing the wife to live like in a hippie community, sharing all the spaces and mother Debbie is very protective of her space and her in- house slot machine. Brazilians don’t have a sense of space, since we have none. The same situation happened with Jihoon, the Korean guy who impregnated the girl after meeting her for the first time. 

Jihoon was still leaving with his parents, doing small schemes to make money. So, as his life goes well, he decided to bring the American girlfriend, her 3 years old daughter, and the newborn baby to live in Korea. What can go wrong? Inside of his parent’s tiny house. Last season, he rented an apartment on a bad neighborhood, Deavon’s mom freaked out, the kid almost got hit by a car and all this end up with Jihoon crying on the sidewalk, smoking a cigarette, guilty and a complete emotional wreck. This shows it not for the weak minded. We also have Paul. For 3 years now we see this man move back and forth from Brazil, with a translator that helped him get a girlfriend, marry her and have a baby. With no job. They go to Brazil like they are crossing the Indiana-Kentucky border. His neurotic behavior led Karine to believe he can’t control his temper. I don’t think he can either. Paul, as far as I can see, is the true American, problematic, gaslight the hell out of the girl, blames and manipulate her, because of that feed his ego. Yes, they can get away from each other. 

That’s the end of part one of showing my extensive knowledge of the show. I love trash tv talk and I could talk about it hours on end. That’s why I’m working on the second part which will include: The rude crowd, The spoiled brats (ew! Leida), and the Brazilians (because I have a lot to say about my people and the reckless behavior) 

If you watch the show too, please let me know on the comments what is the most chaotic person on the show so far.

J.G.Snelly

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  1. I have been also noticed that there is a lot of similarities in the storylines that we’re following. Have you been following the storyline with Liz and Andrei (and her family). It’s like a trainwreck, you can’t look away even if you try!

    • Yes! Liz and Andrei need a break from her family! They are trash! ! I will have another post soon talking about the other types on the troupe, like the spoiled brats, the Brazilians and the rude crowd.

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